A few years ago, a friend told me about “Guided Masturbation,” which is a behavioural therapy used to support people experiencing orgasm difficulties. It has most commonly been used with women, though it can also apply to some men.

几年前，我一个朋友跟我提到“定向手淫”（Guided Masturbation），这是一种用于帮助改善高潮困难的行为疗法。它多用于女性，但部分男性也适用

It may include techniques such as Kegel exercises. While I have not formally trained in this specific therapeutic model, I focus more on sex psychology than medical sex therapy. From what I have read, some structured behavioural approaches have also been adapted in forensic settings to manage harmful sexual impulses. These behaviours are illegal and absolutely unacceptable, and professional supervision is essential in those contexts.

其中可能包含凯格尔训练等技巧。虽然我自己并未系统学习这一疗法（我的专长更偏向性心理，而非医学性治疗），但我查阅资料时也发现，某些行为疗法在司法系统中会被用于管理有害的性冲动。这类行为在法律和社会层面都是绝对不可接受的，在此类情况下必须在专业监管下进行治疗

It’s OK If You Don’t Orgasm

没高潮也没关系

The purpose of this practice is not to force an orgasm. The goal is awareness, connection, and understanding your own body.

这个练习的目的并不是一定要达到高潮，而是帮助你更好地觉察、连结和理解自己的身体

Toys Are Optional

可以用玩具，也可以不用

Traditional guided masturbation exercises do not always emphasise sex toys. However, if you feel comfortable, you may choose to include them to explore different sensations. They are tools, not requirements.

在传统的指导性手淫练习中，并不一定强调使用性爱玩具。如果你愿意，也可以尝试加入玩具，去探索不同的感觉。它们只是工具，并非必需

Meditation Steps

冥想步骤

When I first studied counselling, I often practised guided mindfulness meditations with soft voice recordings. They helped me feel grounded and calm. Later, during my sex therapy training, I encountered similar body-focused exercises, including something called the “Genital Breathing Technique.”

刚开始学心理咨询时，我常做一些正念冥想练习，通过手机里温柔的声音引导呼吸，那种方式能帮助人专注、放松。后来在学习性咨询时，也接触到类似的身体练习，其中包括“Genital Breathing Technique”（私处呼吸练习）

First, find a safe and private space. Sit or lie down comfortably. If you do not feel safe, relaxation will be difficult, and that affects your experience.

先找一个安全、私密的空间坐下或躺下。如果环境不安全，你很难真正放松，这会影响整个体验

Loosen your clothing or wear something comfortable. You may choose to undress if that feels right. If you feel shy or uncertain, pause and ask yourself what would help you feel more at ease, such as dimming the lights or closing your eyes.

可以松开衣服，穿宽松的衣物，或根据舒适度选择是否脱衣。如果感到害羞或不确定，先停下来问问自己：我需要什么才能更自在？例如关灯或闭上眼睛

Take a slow breath in through your nose. Exhale gently through your mouth. Notice the temperature of the air. Let your breathing become steady and calm.

通过鼻子慢慢吸气，再用嘴巴缓缓呼气。感受空气的温度，让呼吸变得平稳

You may softly move your lips or make gentle sounds as you exhale. Let your breath guide you into your body. There is no need to perform. Simply notice.

呼气时可以轻轻动动嘴唇，或发出轻柔的声音。让呼吸带你回到身体的感觉中。不需要表演，只需觉察

Begin by gently touching neutral areas such as your face, neck, shoulders, arms or torso. Move slowly. Notice texture, warmth, pressure. Stay curious.

从脸部、脖子、肩膀、手臂或躯干等中性部位开始轻柔触摸。动作放慢，觉察触感、温度与压力，保持好奇心

As you continue, allow your hands to explore more areas of your body. Change pressure and rhythm. Notice how your body responds. There is no right or wrong reaction.

继续探索身体的不同部位，改变压力与节奏。观察身体的反应。没有所谓正确或错误的感觉

If you feel arousal building, simply notice it. If you feel nothing, that is also fine. Keep breathing. Stay present.

如果性唤起开始升起，就只是觉察它。如果暂时没有感觉，也没关系。继续呼吸，保持当下

You might imagine energy flowing through your body as you move your hands. Touch yourself with care rather than urgency. You may repeat a phrase silently, such as: “My body deserves attention and respect.”

可以想象能量随着双手在身体中流动。用关爱的态度触碰自己，而不是急促。你也可以在心里默念：“我的身体值得被尊重与关注。”

If you choose to stimulate more sensitive areas, do so slowly and mindfully. Pay attention to your breathing and the sensations rising and falling.

如果你愿意触碰更敏感的部位，也请缓慢而专注地进行。留意呼吸以及感觉的变化

If orgasm happens, allow yourself to rest afterwards. Do not rush away from the experience. Notice your breathing, heartbeat and emotional state.

如果高潮发生了，给自己一点时间休息。不要急着结束。觉察呼吸、心跳与情绪的变化

Tips

Whether or not you orgasm, the practice itself can deepen your awareness of pleasure. Every session may feel different. Curiosity is more important than performance.

无论是否高潮，这个练习本身都能帮助你更了解自己的愉悦体验。每一次都可能不同，保持好奇比追求表现更重要

If you choose to include tools such as lubricant or toys, use them as supportive additions rather than replacements for connection. The goal is not intensity, but awareness.

如果你选择使用润滑液或玩具，请把它们当作辅助工具，而不是替代品。这个练习的核心不是强度，而是觉察