Should Elders Be “Sexless”?

长辈们就应该“性绝缘”吗？

In many societies, older adults’ sex lives are ignored or treated as taboo.

在我们的社会中，老年人的性生活常常被忽视，甚至成为禁忌

We often hear comments like, “You’re too old for that,” or “At your age, you still think about sex?”

我们常听到“年纪大了不行了”或者“这个年纪还想这些？”

But sexual desire does not disappear simply because we grow older.

但性欲不会随着年龄增长而自动消失

Desire is part of being human, at any age.

无论多大年纪，拥有性欲都是人类正常的一部分

We should not dismiss elders’ sexual needs simply because of age.

我们不该因为年龄而否定长辈的性需求

Sex Is Not a KPI. Quality Matters More.

性爱不是KPI，质量更重要

Some studies suggest that older adults who have sex at least twice a month report higher levels of wellbeing.

有研究发现，每月至少两次性生活的老年人幸福感更高

But this does not mean you must force yourself to meet a quota.

但这并不意味着要把性当成“任务”

Sex is not just intercourse.

性爱不仅仅是性交

Kissing, hugging, touching, and emotional intimacy can all bring satisfaction.

亲吻、拥抱、爱抚和情感连接都可以带来满足感

The most important thing is communication. Understand each other’s needs and focus on connection rather than frequency.

最重要的是沟通，了解彼此的需求，追求连接感，而不是次数

Sex Changes with Age

性爱会随着年龄发生改变

Many middle-aged and older women may prefer affection and closeness over penetration.

很多中老年女性更重视亲密接触，比如亲吻、拥抱或按摩，而不只是性交

Some men may miss penetrative sex but might face challenges such as erectile difficulties.

有些男性可能怀念性交的过程，但也可能遇到勃起方面的困难

After menopause, vaginal dryness is common and can make penetration uncomfortable.

女性更年期后可能出现阴道干涩，让性交变得不舒服

These changes are normal.

这些变化是正常的

Accepting them and exploring new forms of intimacy is the key to maintaining a satisfying sex life.

接受身体变化，探索新的亲密方式，是维持性生活质量的关键

Masturbation Is Also a Healthy Option

自慰也是健康的选择

Masturbation is often stigmatised among older adults, but it is a normal and healthy form of sexual expression.

中老年人的自慰常被污名化，但它其实是一种正常健康的性表达方式

It can help maintain desire and increase self-awareness.

它可以帮助保持性欲，也有助于了解自己的身体

Sex toys can also be used safely if desired.

如果愿意，也可以安全地使用性玩具

The key is comfort and consent, whether alone or with a partner.

关键是找到自己觉得舒服的方式，无论是一个人还是和伴侣一起

Lubricants Matter

润滑液很重要

Vaginal dryness becomes more common with age.

随着年龄增长，阴道干涩变得更常见

Using a simple, fragrance-free lubricant can significantly improve comfort.

使用成分简单、无香料的润滑液可以明显改善舒适度

Avoid heavily scented or irritating products.

避免使用香味浓重或刺激性强的产品

If dryness persists, consult a doctor about options such as local oestrogen treatment.

如果干涩持续存在，可以咨询医生是否适合使用局部雌激素治疗

A Healthy Lifestyle Supports Sexual Health

健康生活方式支持性健康

Sexual health is closely linked to overall health.

性健康与整体健康密切相关

Avoid smoking, limit alcohol, exercise regularly, maintain a healthy weight, eat balanced meals, and prioritise sleep.

不吸烟、控制饮酒、定期运动、保持健康体重、均衡饮食、保证睡眠

Physical wellbeing creates the foundation for sexual wellbeing.

身体健康是性健康的基础

Last words

我的反思

Even if intercourse becomes more difficult with age, sex can still be rich, playful, and meaningful.

即使随着年龄增长，性交变得困难，性依然可以丰富、有趣、有意义

Sex is not only about bodies. It is about emotional connection, intimacy, and shared experience.

性不仅仅是身体的结合，更是情感的连接与陪伴

Growing older does not mean giving up pleasure.

变老不等于放弃愉悦

Embrace the changes, explore new ways of being close, and continue growing together.

接受变化，探索新的亲密方式，与伴侣一起继续成长

Intimacy has no expiry date.

亲密关系没有保质期