Emotional Abuse in Narcissistic Relationships

自恋型伴侣中的情感虐待

Dating someone with strong narcissistic traits can be deeply damaging.

和具有强烈自恋特质的人谈恋爱，很容易受到伤害

You may experience gaslighting, manipulation, constant blame, or emotional neglect.

你可能经历煤气灯效应、操控、被反复指责，或者被忽视

Over time, you start doubting yourself.
“Is it my fault?”
“Maybe I’m too sensitive.”
“Maybe I’m the problem.”

久而久之，你会开始怀疑自己
“是不是我太敏感？”
“是不是都是我的错？”

Emotional abuse makes you lose your sense of identity. You forget who you are and what you need.

情感虐待会让你迷失自我，不知道自己是谁，也不知道自己的需求是什么

How Do You Heal?

如何疗愈？

The first and most important step is to reduce or cut contact.

第一步，也是最重要的一步，是减少联系，甚至断联

This is not easy. Breakups always hurt. But remind yourself: the manipulation and harm were real.

这并不容易。任何分手都会痛。但请记住，对方的操控和伤害是真实存在的

Step 1: Acknowledge the Abuse

第一步：承认你曾被伤害

When someone gaslights you, you minimise what happened.

被煤气灯效应影响时，你会不自觉地淡化自己的经历

Write it down.
Talk to someone you trust.
Name what happened.

写下来
说出来
把事情真实地命名出来

Clarity is the beginning of recovery.

清晰，是疗愈的起点

Step 2: Allow Yourself to Grieve

第二步：允许自己悲伤

Even abusive relationships are still relationships.

即便是虐待关系，那依然是一段关系

You may still miss them.
You may still love them.
You may miss the “good moments.”

你可能仍然怀念对方
你可能仍然爱着对方
你可能怀念那些“好的时刻”

This does not make you weak.

这不代表你软弱

Grieving is part of healing.

悲伤本身，就是疗愈的一部分

Step 3: Break Old Patterns

第三步：打破旧模式

You may have learned to people-please.
You may struggle with boundaries.
You may avoid conflict to keep peace.

你可能习惯讨好
你可能很难立界限
你可能为了维持关系而压抑自己

These patterns did not appear overnight.

这些模式不是一夜之间形成的

Therapy can help you understand why you were drawn into that dynamic.

心理咨询可以帮助你理解，自己为什么会进入这样的关系模式

Do not rush into a new relationship.
Focus on rebuilding yourself first.

不要急着进入下一段关系
先把自己找回来

Step 4: Heal the Trauma

第四步：疗愈创伤

Emotional abuse is trauma.

情感虐待本身就是创伤

A trauma-informed therapist can help you process what happened.

找一位熟悉创伤工作的心理师，帮助你梳理和处理经历

EMDR, trauma-focused therapy, or cognitive therapy can all support recovery.

EMDR、创伤聚焦疗法、认知疗法等都可能帮助你恢复

It takes time. Healing is not linear.

疗愈需要时间，而且不会是直线过程

Step 5: Reclaim Your Identity

第五步：找回真实的自己

In toxic relationships, we shrink ourselves.

在有毒关系中，我们常常缩小自己

After leaving, you may feel lost.
You may not even know what you like anymore.

离开后，你可能会感到迷茫
甚至不知道自己真正喜欢什么

Start small.

从小事开始

Choose what you eat.
Choose what you wear.
Choose how you spend your weekend.

自己决定吃什么
自己决定穿什么
自己决定周末怎么过

These small choices rebuild self-trust.

这些小决定会慢慢重建你对自己的信任

In the End

最后

If you are currently in an emotionally abusive relationship, consider reducing contact or going no-contact. Seek professional support if possible.

如果你正在经历情感虐待，考虑减少联系或断联，并尽量寻求专业支持

If you have already left but still feel broken, try these five steps.

如果你已经离开，但仍然感到受伤，可以尝试以上五个步骤

You are not “too sensitive.”
You are not “crazy.”
You were hurt.

你不是太敏感。
你不是疯了。
你只是受伤了。

And you can heal.

你一定可以好起来

Your life will become steadier and brighter again.

你的生活会慢慢重新变得稳定、清晰、明亮